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Looking back, we consider the television offerings of the past year, a handful of shows stand out not for their excellence, but for their spectacular failures. Ranging from awkward sequels to bafflingly poor docuseries, here are the programmes that had us scratching our heads or simply reaching for the remote.

The 'Sex and the City' Sequel

How to start with this love/hate spin-off? Burdened with woeful scripts, painful arcs (justice for Miranda!), and a paltry 71 seconds of beloved Samantha, the series struggled to justify its existence. Briefly, as the final series began, it looked like it had at last found its groove. Then arrived an episode all about Seema’s natural deodorant. No wonder the creator declared this would be the last season. It concluded on a bum note; the lingering shot of Miranda’s loo full of poo was just way too symbolic. Yet, fans undeniably had a hoot picking apart every single “wtf?” moment. And as Carrie – a single woman once more – twirled around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who didn’t let out a small sob?

All’s Fair

‘Can Kim Kardashian act? Of course she can’t.’

But that was almost the smallest of this show's issues. The subject of a exceedingly uncommon zero star assessment, it was hard to know where to start listing the problems. The laughably wooden dialogue? The tedious veneration of affluence and consumption? The almost wilful procession of tropes? Performances so poor they felt almost malicious? Let’s just say “each and every one” and never speak of this show again. However, a new season has been ordered, so we’re probably going to have to.

AKA Charlie Sheen

Given the restraining orders, abuse claims and fatherly shortcomings, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a bad boy. Not that you’d really have known it from this three-part documentary which chuckled along at Sheen’s various episodes of self-destructive hedonism while struggling to tell us anything we weren't already aware of. Rather, it felt as if this loose cannon was being indulged, so any pity this show might induce should be saved for the people who have had to suffer close contact with this charismatic but flippant egotist.

The Supercomputer Drama

Naturally we understood it was preposterous from the outset: a drama about a AI known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either save the world – or destroy all of humanity. We stuck with it out of pure admiration for its leads … but by the end, it felt like even they had stopped bothering. One scarcely reacted when his character died, and the other ultimately slicing Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. Talk about admitting defeat.

The Gangster Drama

Dodgy figures convening in empty boxing gyms? The Prodigy’s Firestarter blaring in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its crime drama back.

Actually, that is unfair on the crime shows of the late 90s. Many look a little old-fashioned now, but at least they didn’t endure the embarrassment of having to indulge baffling dialects. But there were plenty of other problems. Mainly that it was just profoundly boring; a conflict over narcotics territory between various London picaresques which felt rather simplistic.

The Meghan Markle Series

Considering the degree to which she provokes the ire of certain ostentatiously enraged commentators, it’s temptingly easy to applaud the Duchess of Sussex’s televised ventures into quaint lifestyle as deliberate statements. But then you view them and are compelled to admit that actually, they might have a point. It’s like watching a lifestyle magazine animated; a poster for wine o’clock with delusions of grandeur; a procession of snoozing dogs, humming beehives, sentimental sayings and forgettable crafting “tips” you’ll forget instantly. All supported by immense, largely undeserved wealth. Ugh.

Victoria Beckham

There are obviously fascinating things to be discussed about regarding Victoria Beckham and her struggles with vocation, identity, self-worth. But for some reason, this documentary series opted not to explore them. Instead, the viewing was akin to reading a marketing catalogue. She obviously has every right to resent what she describes as her “stern” image. But sadly, she didn’t do herself any helps with this guarded non-event of a series.

The Game Show

It had the potential to be the next cultural phenomenon – except even camper, with a famous star as a deceased benefactor and a well-known personality overseeing her estate. What more could you want? As players battled it out, there was plenty of betrayal and squabbling. But the rules quickly became bewildering: it’s even now too complicated to explain what precisely was happening. Even more regrettably, we only saw brief appearances of the star via prerecorded videos. The series ended up reeking of a programme that was straining desperately to emulate something far greater than it.

Too Much

How do you succeed a show that defined a generation? The pressure was immense for this starry romantic comedy about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who arrives in London with a shattered romance. The lead actress seized the opportunity by the horns and was joyous to watch, reveling in Austen levels of romantic notions. But it was all very glossy and, paradoxically, was insufficient. Plus, the sheer amount of celebrity friends involved felt uncomfortable.

The Sketch Show Return

Not good enough to be ‘patchy’.

Given the shrewd recruitment of gifted younger comics, hopes were high. But unhappily, most of it didn’t land. A particular sketch was a one-note joke milked to a husk but repeated in every episode. One star seemed too willing to slip into a well-known ranting mode. The writing room sketches, in contrast, simply provoked the thought that they should probably have remained in there a while longer.

The Knox Dramatisation

This dramatisation of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively showcased the viewpoint of Amanda Knox. So, while there undoubtedly is an compelling drama to be made about the tragic 2007 murder, this isn’t it. The subject matter needed to be handled sensitively. Instead, the series laboured awkwardly to find the right tone, lumbering from strangely jaunty, slightly mannered farce to ultimately, real-life horror. Twisted? Arguably. A complete mess? Very much so.

Prime Target

We love the star … but did we believe him playing the most brilliant maths genius since, a man so intelligent he’s on the brink of a discovery that could destabilise society? No! This international thriller about government agencies targeting – and killing off – intellectuals honestly got more absurd by the second. Silliness-by-numbers.

The Bonnie Blue Documentary

This uncritical portrait followed the online personality renowned for sexual escapades as she undertook her biggest challenge yet. What on earth would possess her? What we wanted was far greater interrogation of her actual psyche, plus those of the men in the queue. They could at least have interviewed the legendary mum who appeared to haul her son away from the queue. What we got was horrific imagery and absolutely no critical analysis of her infamy whatsoever. And to think, the documentary-maker has a teenage daughter too.